This one’s personal, Folks . . .

Change is one of the few certainties in life. Sometimes it comes as a gentle nudge, other times as an unexpected storm that sweeps away what we once knew. The way we face these storms, how we adapt, grow and lean on others defines who we become.

Today my blog is co-authored with my son, aka Ivan Joseph. It’s a story of grappling with unwanted change, finding unexpected resilience, and discovering the power of community.

From the Booth to the Unknown

For the past two years, my son’s identity was wrapped up in his voice. A "Voice of the Yellowjackets" at his university--he was a sports broadcaster and announcer. In class, presentations were his jam. In groups, he was an outstanding facilitator--a ringmaster able to control the ebbs and flows of the crowd with his booming voice and bigger personality. His daily life revolved around sports, storytelling and sharing the excitement of the game with fans or his latest research with his classmates. Much like me, his voice was more than a tool, it was a large facet of his identity and connection to the world.

Days after graduating, life threw him a curveball he never saw coming. A sudden health complication left some of his vocal cords paralyzed. On the other side of anesthesia everything had changed. The job he had just been offered in sales, his joy of sportscasting, the persona he had built, and all sense of direction and purpose seemed to slip through his fingers.

Facing the Darkness

The period that followed wasn’t a triumphant rise from adversity, at least not right away. It was a journey of hills and valleys, with plenty of low points and moments of despair. There were days when he questioned his value and purpose, wondering, “How do I even start to move forward?”

It was hard for me, too. It’s one thing to offer objective, positive advice to others. It’s another to sit with your son in a valley. It’s something else entirely for Young Ivan to apply that same kindness to himself when he’s in the depths of loss.

Even in that dark place, I reminded him of one simple truth. Although his voice was diminished, he still had his mind, his mobility and many other gifts. At first, that felt harsh, but ultimately, it was true. There’s always someone facing greater challenges. Self-pity might offer temporary comfort, but it doesn’t move you closer to your goals.

The Power of Grit and Growth

Grit and resilience aren’t cultivated when things are just a little hard. They emerge when you’re at your lowest. He decided to begin learning to code with AI and exploring sports analytics, drawing on his background in sports and his experience in finance. Instead of letting this period become wasted time, he started to turn his attention and focus to upskilling and adapting, determined to flip adversity into opportunity. His first project was building a custom soccer analytics app to help refine my decision-making as a coach.

Professional development doesn’t always look how you expect. Sometimes, it’s not about mastering a new subject or getting a certificate. It can also be about learning to persevere, to shine and grow even when the path is hard and the outcome uncertain.

No One Overcomes Alone

One lesson stands out above all during this challenging time. You don’t get through life’s hardest challenges alone. Lean into your village. Family, friends and loved ones will rally around you if you let them. This village does need to be dozens. It can be as small as one or two. We just have to let them in. Their messages, visits and encouragement will fill your cup on days it feels empty. It’s not easy to share bad news. It took a while before my son was ready to share. Young Ivan told me, “Often when I am not open to new opportunities, my supporters have helped me see the potential that still lies ahead, reminding me of the light at the end of the tunnel.”

It’s easy to withdraw when your confidence has taken a hit, but the people who care for you can be the difference between staying stuck and moving forward. Optimism can be hard to find in the darkness, but community can help you hold onto hope when you can’t see it yourself.

Looking Forward

If you’re facing unwanted change, know that nobody’s path is all rainbows and sunshine. Maybe you didn’t get that promotion, or you’ve failed or been heartbroken. The best among us learns how to open up and face their fears, gather their village, and push through together.

Whatever change you’re facing, may you find resilience within yourself and strength in your community until you’re able to rebuild your confidence.